Motherhood & Spiritual Practice
At TLC we are always working on finding balance in our lives; from the mind and the body, our feminine and masculine, to being out in the world living life fully while maintaining a consistent spiritual practice.
One of life’s greatest tests of achieving balance is through the gift of becoming a parent. We wanted to share with our community some insights from three beautiful women - Angelina, Mish and Sarah - who have all experienced their pregnancy while completing a TLC Training with Sian (however we can’t scientifically prove Sian’s teachings = conception, but it happens…;) and the major shifts and magical realisations that have come with their personal journey of motherhood and their commitment to their unique spiritual path and growth.
“Spiritual practice is a lifeline that has revealed an unshakeable strength I never knew was in me.”
- Sarah
Which TLC Training were you part of and at what stage of your pregnancy were you?
Angelina:
I am currently undertaking the 12 month TLC Method with Sian and I was pregnant for the first 7 months!
Mish:
TLC Method. Just over 6 months pregnant
Sarah:
I found out I was pregnant in January right at the start of the TLC Method training and gave birth to my daughter Poppy at the start of October, so I was pregnant for most of the course. I also managed to attend the October Sadhana practice online when Poppy was 10 days old - which I’m super proud of still haha!
(Ruby: MY GOODNESS so you should be Sarah!!!)
What was your daily practice like before and how has it changed since giving birth?
“I am less consistent, yet more present.”
- Angelina
Angelina:
Before giving birth, my daily Sadhana looked the same everyday. Upon waking up I would practice uninterrupted for at least an hour. Evenings before bed, I would practice again, perhaps, twenty to thirty minutes, sometimes more. My evening practice was less structured and more intuitive. Even prior to the Method, I had been meditating daily for up to an hour, mostly focused on the breath. This was a non negotiable for me. It didn’t matter where I was, be it on a holiday, a weekend away, I would always carve out time for me. To simply sit in stillness. My daily practice was a vital part of my life.
Fast forward to giving birth in Covid times. My practice now looks vastly different. With a very hungry baby, I now find my Sadhana is broken up throughout my day. Each breastfeed presents an opportunity to practice. Each tummy time session presents an opportunity to practice the dynamic Kriyas. Being awake to feed bubs every few hours in the night, means more time to practice in the stillness of the evening. I am less consistent, yet more present.
Mish:
I meditated daily consistently for at least a year before starting the program, 20 to 30 minutes, adding pranayama practice to this about 2 months before. Prior to this consistency, I was in and out of practice for about 3 years. My practice now continues daily, however consists of 1 to 2, sometimes even 3 hours of dedicated time. I rise very early in the morning to fit it all in!
Sarah:
“10 minutes can be just as powerful as a 90 minute practice.”
- Sarah
Pre-baby I had been struggling with consistency so I began a daily meditation and yoga practice in December to give myself time to settle in before the Method started in January. I’d meditate for 20-30 minutes each morning first thing when I woke up before I ate breakfast and then do some yoga, journalling (gratitude list or morning pages) and quite often class planning for later in the day for 30 minutes or so after. It was an hour everyday that allowed me to feel more connected and it was the same time each day so once I had established the habit it was easy to keep. It changed a bit in my first trimester when I had some morning sickness - I needed vegemite toast to settle my stomach before meditation!
Since giving birth the biggest change is that how I do my practice at home is always changing as Poppy grows. I loved having the set time pre-baby but I felt incredible amounts of fatigue and overwhelm in those early newborn days, so letting go of first thing in the morning practice made me sad initially. I felt like I should be able to do this one thing I had always been able to do - even if i'd been up half the night! I learned to practice later in the morning/afternoon and evening depending on the day.
At the moment, Poppy wakes up at 7am and i can get some yoga in while she’s playing. Then when she has a nap at about 9:30am I can sit down to meditate and do any pranayama or journalling. During lockdown I also did Nat’s Shake and Release practice on a Sunday morning and she loved watching me jump around our living room.
“Grit, perseverance, and the intuition of the mother pushes forward, powering those aspects of yourself that are purely exhausted.”
- Mish
What are the biggest difficulties or challenges in continuing your practice?
Angelina:
The biggest challenge is finding a consistent amount of time to practice. I am still working so even if bubba is asleep, there is always something that needs to be done be it in my business or around the house. It also seems as I sit down to practice, somehow the baby knows and will need my attention!
Mish:
Motherhood teaches you to juggle better than ever before. There are certainly many challenges when young children are some of the balls in the air. These ones simply can’t be dropped! Fitting in time for it all, in the way you’d like to see it, is not always possible. Flexibility and acceptance is a necessity; attitudes I had to become more welcoming of as time went on. Cultivating a flexible mindset is one thing you either adapt to early on, or resist with inevitable disappointment. A wasted energy. I’ve learnt to allow for the practice to be broken up into segments, shortened or adapted in ways that can be more accessible.
Coming into acceptance, I become better at this every day. Acceptance of many things. Primarily, that the dharma of life shifts. To see this as growth, in the welcoming of greater joy and goodness, rather than a removal of time or personal desires. Grit, perseverance, and the intuition of the mother pushes forward, powering those aspects of yourself that are purely exhausted. There is a version of the practice that becomes right and all seems to fit into place with divine timing.
“The devotion to daily practice is a gift… this journey supports me in stepping into the better, brighter version of myself, for myself and my adoring family.”
- Mish
Sarah:
For me it’s accepting that some days I’ll only get 10 minutes to practice, or 5 minutes…. or 2 minutes! But that it’s better than nothing. It also becomes more challenging to meditate and practice around your baby the more mobile they get - you’re like a mum shaped climbing gym as soon as you come into down dog.
“We think it’s for ourselves - and it is - but it’s also for those we love, I would come back much more present and calm.”
- Sarah
A challenge I faced early on was asking for help from my partner and family to take care of Poppy so I could practice or rest. Early on, you feel like any spare moment you have baby free should be spent doing something productive. I think having a consistent practice throughout pregnancy helped me overcome this because I knew how much better I felt from taking this time out to practice. We think it’s for ourselves - and it is - but it’s also for those we love, I would come back much more present and calm. It takes more determination and planning to be consistent than it ever did before.
“My two biggest lessons have been learning to let go and being ok with asking for help.”
- Angelina
What have you learned about yourself and your practice in this process?
Angelina:
Not being able to practice in the same way I was before, I was becoming angry, agitated, frustrated and disappointed in myself. I was expecting life to be the same, whilst placing enormous pressure on myself to ‘do it all.’ My two biggest lessons have been learning to let go and being ok with asking for help. To really loosen the grips of control. As I continue to practice letting go, being more present with the little human, I am enjoying my time as a new mum more and more as each day passes.
“I realised my practice doesn’t have to look a certain way for now, it is always within me and not something outside of me.”
- Angelina
I am stepping into this incredible place of feeling truly present, patient and allowing space for the process to unfold without trying to control it in any way. I realised my practice doesn’t have to look a certain way for now, it is always within me and not something outside of me.
Mish:
I have learnt so so much, but in an effort to keep this brief, I will concisely say this. The commitment, the devotion to daily practice is a gift. A gift you can honour yourself with, and that honours you so profoundly in return. Your internal environment becomes calmer, more stable. You create space, and opportunity for The witness within you to observe, receive and share in ways you could not have previously imagined. Every day new lessons unfold, and it is quite clear that this journey supports me in stepping into the better, brighter version of myself, for myself and my adoring family.
Sarah:
So much! That 10 minutes can be just as powerful as a 90 minute practice… but sometimes you really need that 90 minute practice! And in that case, someone else can look after the baby so you can look after yourself.
I’ve always been pretty disorganized but having a baby kind of forces you to get clear on what and where you spend your time when you get those precious hours to yourself. I learned that I can schedule time everyday to practice and stick to it, and that at the same time, I also learned to be more fluid and patient in waiting for the time in my day to emerge (nap time usually!) and making my practice the top priority - the first thing I do in that time for myself. Really I’ve learned how much a daily practice means to me, because it’s how you figure out what is meaningful and important in your life - spiritual practice is a lifeline that has revealed an unshakeable strength I never knew was in me.
the tlc method
Interested in joining the TLC Method like Ange, Mish and Sarah? Head to our website for full details.
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